Rollercoaster Ride

Nobody ever told me this (or maybe they did but I didn't pay attention), but a relationship is a lot like a rollercoaster ride. For the heart. And you just can't quite get off. It scares the heck out of you sometimes, drops your heart into your stomach, makes you scream "LET ME OFF"; but then the next second it's a rush, and you're so enjoying the ride and you can't imagine getting off, you want to stay on and ride it forever because it's scary but it's the greatest ride ever.

If my description of a roller-coaster ride makes you say, "What are you talking about? I've never felt that way when riding a roller coaster!"; you'll just have to bear with me, I've never *actually* been on a rollercoaster so this is a little bit of imagination! haha

But that's how my relationship makes me feel. Tonight is one of those scaring the heck out of you nights. Tonight is one of those "Why the heck did I WANT to get on this ride?!?!" nights. Tonight is one of those nights.

See, one of the downsides of dating a Real Life Dude is that they don't always tell you what's going on in their minds or hearts. They don't always talk to you, period. My dude seems to have this thought that emotions are a sign of weakness, and doesn't like to "sweet talk" to me. When he does, it's always followed by "Now don't tell ANYONE I said that!". Romantic, right?

He also has this thing where he thinks it's perfectly acceptable to sign out of Facebook right in the middle of a conversation we might be having, only to come back an hour or two later and continue the conversation like he never left. This frustrates the Romantic Girl quite a bit, because, he never even says goodbye. Romantic Girl would appreciate a "I have to go eat dinner babe, but I will be back as soon as possible so that I can keep talking to you, because you are the greatest girlfriend ever." Okay, so that's only in my dreams. I'd be willing to settle for even a "gtg" or "brb" or "ttyl". Reality, however, strikes again and I'm left looking at a message that says "Real Life Dude* has signed off chat, you can still send him a message."
*name changed to protect the guilty

This is hard for me. Being a Romantic Girl, not only do I want him to be a fabulous boyfriend, but I also want to be an awesome girlfriend. I want to cultivate the romance in our relationship, not shut it down, so I'm sometimes more understanding than I should be? Nevertheless, the issue of boyfriend signing out of FB without notice had been brought up a few weeks ago and thought to have been resolved, but here we are again tonight.

Romantic Girl also happens to be an Overthinking Girl, so this type of behavior leads directly to thoughts such as:
"He must not love me anymore"
"He can't stand talking to me"
"What did I do wrong??"
Etc, etc.

In reality though, he probably just got "sidetracked" because his friends asked him to play video games with them.

Ah, the fun times of dating a Real Life Dude. Mention a video game and all thoughts of his girlfriend go flying out of his head faster than you can say "League of Legends." Didn't help that tonight was supposed to be a date night but he 'called out sick'. Hmmmm.